What a feeling..

Rain! Yay, finally! A little less sneezing now, if I'm lucky.

Anyway, it's been a weird couple of days. Been arguing with some people, hanging out with others, and been with the family today, planning our trip this weekend. I was supposed to ask a friend to join, but since I'm not getting along great with this particular friend, these days, I convinced the grandparents to invite Helene. It'll be great, I'm really looking forward to the waterslides, so I'm hoping the weather will behave.

Hmm. I've been considering some things about my cat, lately. I'm not home as much as I used to be, and I'm starting to feel really crappy about leaving him alone so much. When I'm finally here, I'm tired and easily get annoyed by him. It's not really fair to him. So I did the research today, about getting him replaced, cause he's only 3 years old, he's pretty much a big kitten.

When it got down to it, though.. I keep returning to the mental image of actually letting him out of my arms, turn my back to him and leave, and it just breaks my heart. I don't think I could do that. No, I know I can't. Annoying, furry and noisy as he is.. He's my baby. I've taken care of him since he was 10 weeks old, he could sleep curled up in the palm of my hand.

I can't, I just can't. I've decided to make more time for him in stead. He won't eat that much when he's lonely, and I don't like he's been losing a little weight. Not much, maybe a pound, but for a 11-12 pound cat, it's a fairly big amount. Maybe I'm just worrying too much, he's lost a little weight and gained it again, before, I just don't like it.

So, after.. I think 2-3 months careful consideration, I've come to the decision I'm just not ready to leave my furball behind. I can't imagine never being woken up by being poked by a paw on the nose, again.

I think I'm coming down with something. I've been feeling odd for awhile. (The carsickness I've been having lately doesn't help. I get nausea from 5 minutes in any road-driving vehicle. Which points me to believe the allergy pills didn't really have anything to do with it, other then intensify it. The nasal spray, while a hell of a lot more uncomfortable to use, works better and faster. And I don't like pills in the first place.)

Can't figure out what's causing the motion sickness, though. I haven't had it since I was a kid, and even then it was only when I had to go far, and now I suddenly suffer from it several days a week. I wish I knew what's causing it.

But back to my point about feeling sick. Today I actually had to go and lie down after very suddenly getting sick. I was just glad I hadn't eaten much to begin with. I had an intense pain going on in my stomach that made it pretty much impossible to get comfortable, and I ended up having to take some painkillers for it. (I hate doing this because I've grown somewhat resistant to these pills, during a fun little year of suffering from migraine, and in order for them to work, I have to double the recommended amount. Not exactly healthy.)

And I can't figure it out. I'm eating as I should, watching the acids and grains, getting my vitamins and all the other crap rules I have to follow to keep my stomach acid in check and my immune system and vitamins at a decent level.
I'm, despite what people tend to think, getting the excersize I need, I walk a lot more then most, and the whole staircase thing definitely does its work on my legmuscles.
I'm watching out for draft, cause the summer tends to be so hot I don't notice it, and end up getting cold anyway, and my body really does not like cold.
I don't feel overly burdened or concerned about anything, so I don't think it's that either.
And that's pretty much the things that usually affect me. So I'm out of guesses for now. I'll probably figure it out if I get more odd symptoms, I just hope this feeling of.. unwellness without really being sick, I guess.. Won't interfere too much with my plans for the next couple of weeks.

And I've babbled enough for now. I wanted to write this little philosophy I've gone over in my head lately, but I honestly think I'm too incoherent to produce a proper snippet about it, right now. So that's all you get, guys. Night.