The healing power of friendship

I was having a conversation with a guy friend the other night. It was generally about personal growth. He's a bit (okay, 10 years) older than me, so it's only natural he's way ahead of me, when it comes to being aware of himself. It was, however, inspiring. His story feels familiar, though it's very different from mine. Especially when we talked about finding yourself after a long relationship. It was nice to hear some of my own thoughts reflected back, without having to say them.

And I felt at peace, for the first time in.. years. I love that I'm not tied down, that I feel free to be who I am, flaws and all, and deal with them without meeting disappointment or hurt. I am suddenly aware of when I step out of line, again. I've had trouble seeing that for ages. I have the energy to care, again, to connect and reconnect. And to recognize where I'd be spitting into an endless pit. I feel.. healthier. My head feels less fuzzy. I don't feel perfect, just.. better. And it's not the sun coming back out, clearing me of any winter depression, I've felt this for a while, I just haven't acknowledged it, cause I've been busy living my life! Lots of shit sucks in my life right now, don't get me wrong.. I just.. I'm okay with that. It'll work out. It always does, and I'll find a way.

I still have some guys showing interest in me, but it's finally dying down a bit. I no longer feel hunted. I like that. Never was happy about turning people down, but I've gotten a lot of practice, and at least I do it kindly by now. Right now, I'm not interested in that stuff anyway, I'm too busy enjoying my friends to have time for a guy, full time.

The only guy-related thing I wish for, is for my wonderful friends from Jutland to live freaking closer! I have come to realize how much I adore M ^.^ I absolutely love him, he cracks me up on a daily basis, and I don't know how I would've gotten through the last 4-5 months without him. He has been a constant support and distraction, a friend, an escape, a brother. I hope I'll have him in my life for a long time to come, cause sometimes I just want to, like.. squeeze him so tight he becomes a part of me. I think it's Iliza Schlezinger who says something similar about her dog.. "So cute I want to hurt her!" Except with M, it's a mix of cute, awesome, hilarious and witty! He's a gorgeous human being, and I get to enjoy him on an almost daily basis. Everyone should have one of him.

We've been spending hours making up this dog-game XD We take a character from CoW, right? And we find out what defines them, then take those traits and compare them with different dog breeds... Yes, I know. And it gets worse. For example, his character is a Husky, and mine is a Collie (He called me Lassie!). To find out if our characters make a good couple, of course we must look at what Husky/Collie puppies look like! Would we make adorable puppies? Yes! Awesomesauceyou'regonnabegreattogether!

.... I realize how idiotic a game it sounds like, but honestly, it's not only fun, it also makes you have to think about your character in a whole new way, and about its compatibility with others! We went as far as to discussing if this wouldn't be worth writing something about, to use for workshopping. Get to know your character and its relations! Find its inner dog! Sounds stupid, works wonders!

Of course, I also had to figure out Skye's other relationships, from this model. Winterbourne, the teacher she's having an affair with and sorta falling in love with, is a Dalmatian. Her girlfriend was first made to be a Chihuahua, but we finally agreed she wasn't even a dog... She's a mink. Which is fitting, cause two witches can't have babies anyway. I have to say the Collie/Dalmatian puppies are mostly cute in that.. I can't help but love this poor little guy-way. While the Husky/Collie puppies... Are so freaking adorable I want five. And when the get to their teens? Omg. M and I agreed we'd have to shovel suitors off our porch. So we'd better have two, so they can look out for each other. Hex anyone who gets too handsy, with their sibling. We're so fucked up, with some of the discussions we have XD

I don't mind being poor and pointless. Not when I have beautiful people like this in my life.