Birthdays and bitches and pie, oh my!

Okay then! I'm sitting here with my dayplanner open, looking at all the stuff I'm doing the next week. Not to mention the next.. 4? weekends. So many plans! Parties, the circus, my birthday (on thursday! ... the 15th to be exact ^^), dinner plans.. Argh! Stressing!

I'm turning 20. My immediate panic about that has resided. Now I'm just stressed cause everyone seems to have plans for my birthday, that they won't tell me about -.- Deadly annoying, cause I don't know what to prepare for. The constant whispering in the corners is driving me bonkers, I believe the term is. And if it isn't; Now it is.

Been hanging out with the Bat two days in a row. Babysitting, watching movies, eating pie. Yeah, such eventful, exhilerating lifes we lead. But it's been fun, and we've been doing some talking. Some much needed talking, everything is a bit crazy.

And then there was the funny little bit from work, thursday night. This guy who's a regular that I talk to some times, a really cool guy actually, suddenly said something that was so spot on that I was shocked. Shocked that someone who barely knows me could say something so accurate about me. I was telling him and some others to get out of the pool-room so I could clean it and close up, and they were dragging their feet to leave, so I got firm with them. And this guy says to me "You've really grown into this, you know. Just 6 months ago, you'd have asked your stepdad to ask us to leave, now you show authority and do it yourself." I reply that of course, I can't just waltz in there and start ordering people around till people at least have a sense of me, till they respect me. And he smiles and says that it's nice to see a young girl like me, able to step into character when needed, and demand that kind of respect from people, that's it's nice I'm not just one of those girls who sit in a corner quietly. Then he stops himself, laughs, and corrects himself. "No, actually you do sit in the corner quietly. Observing. That's really cool, you observe so you know how to handle each person. People could learn something from you, on that account."

Then he leaves the room, and I'm frozen for a moment, before returning to my cleaning routine. That was freaky. It's EXACTLY what I do. No one has ever really spotted that, without knowing me, before. It's my way of.. How to explain it.. Get comfortable? Get secure? In a situation, a friendship, a location. It's how I operate XD A lot of people close to me knows, usually after I've told them. And this guy just sees it out of the blue. I'm flabbergasted.

My acting skills definitely need work, if an almost-stranger sees right through me like that. Those skills serve as a lifesaver. People who has gotten on my wrong side throughout life, knows what a deceitful little bitch I can be, working those skills to my benefit.

I should really be kinder. Kind was on the list of things I strive to be, I should work on that harder. But my inner evil needs to release some hellfire from time to time. So maybe I should just let it rest. For now. I can be a better person after Christmas.